Author Archives: elroyjones

About elroyjones

Married, no children, responsibly self-directed, living happily.

Notice Love

You’ll be relieved to know that a stay of execution has been granted by HMNHQOTIR (Her Most Noble Highness, Queen of the Immediate Realm, that’s me!) so my husband will live a while longer. He mentioned this morning, like it was nothing … Continue reading

Posted in Human Condition, Marriage | Tagged , , , | 10 Comments

Desperate Pleas

Please keep me from killing my husband today. Please help me be nice to him even though he’s driving me crazy. Please don’t allow my editorial thoughts to escape the filter and become indelible words. Please remind me that I don’t … Continue reading

Posted in Marriage | Tagged , , | 11 Comments

Here Now

As I tell the kids, “I’m not very important but I’m damn busy.” These are the things that are trending in the World of Elroy- The Wedding with the internet conspiracy involving Kate Unger, Saks, and unidentified undercover fashion operatives … Continue reading

Posted in Human Condition | Tagged , , | 12 Comments

Unbelievable News

I watch FSTV every so often but never before bed, too scary. It’s human nature to be concerned only with individual survival. Paying attention is laborious. Excess hasn’t done anything for humanity. In the US we’ve become a medicated nation because … Continue reading

Posted in Human Condition | Tagged , , , , | 12 Comments

Making sandwiches

Making sandwiches. Freshly Pressed for good reason. I’m not a big “How to Write” person but his analogy is terrific.

Posted in Uncategorized | 3 Comments

Conversations In Bars: The I.R.A.

Conversations In Bars: The I.R.A.. Well worth your time, makes you feel like you were there too, particularly the part about beginning afternoon drinking while it’s still morning.

Posted in Uncategorized | 4 Comments

Last Words

My only remaining brother, A.B., owes a small debt to me. I make interest free loans to my siblings from time to time, unlike my sister, the loan shark, who charges 100% interest. I’d like to have the money he … Continue reading

Posted in Friends & Family | Tagged , , , | 12 Comments

Evaluating Class

You know we’re self employed and some of our customers are the upper echelon of society. Yes, the selfsame 1%. I am the Great and Powerful Oz of this operation so we do not budge without a contract. I’ve told you that my … Continue reading

Posted in Human Condition, Politics | Tagged , , , , | 14 Comments

Circular Identification

I’ve been plotting my escape. I plot a daring escape, or a divorce, every spring. You’ll think whatever you want, I wouldn’t expect anything less. My discontent is the direct result of a hyper-responsible nature. There are people who would … Continue reading

Posted in Marriage | Tagged , , , , | 9 Comments

Taking Turns

Yesterday, I saw a friend from the health food store. We had a conversation about mothers, hers and mine. Her grandmother died in December at age 99. Her mother will be 70 this year and she’s spent the last bunch … Continue reading

Posted in Friends & Family | Tagged , , | 7 Comments