My Princess

I have favorites. I know, shocking and scandalous! All of us know people we like more than others, let’s not pretend otherwise. Recently, we attended a very small home wedding. Today, during my union break, I looked through a correspondence folder I’ve been keeping for the bride. I found this.

16 October 2012

My dearest Little Red Haired Princess,

I loved seeing YOU. I have been thinking all about you and, for reasons that are not entirely clear, it has been unsettling. You’ve reached a pivotal place in your life, a place that can seem filled with resignation- “This must be all there is; I thought there’d be more than this.” I suspect seeing your friends have babies and marry (traditionally, it’s the other way around but I haven’t seen a lot of tradition lately) and seeing your parents and me plodding along, doing the same things we’ve always done, isn’t exactly awe inspiring. You’re out there in the world only to discover the world is lacking some of the things you hoped to find.
I was 24 when all of my friends began getting married (for the first time) and 25 when you were born. It appeared as though everyone but me knew what they were doing. I was the only one of my childhood friends who was unsettled. I remember panic and worry that I’d always be out there loose, alone, without a plan. No one could articulate to me that my life wouldn’t always be so confusing, that it would take shape and I’d find my place in my own good time.
My message for you, LRHP, is that patience and time will reveal the life that brings you satisfaction and intermittent happiness. No one is happy all the time; happiness appears in short bursts in between boredom, confusion, and weariness. You are loved by friends and family alike. There will always be a number of places where you will be welcome and safe. Take your time looking around. Get yourself an apartment if that’s what you want, a year is a drop in the bucket, don’t be afraid of the commitment and don’t be afraid of failing at independence.
Life is a long walk, meant to be taken slowly, enjoyed for all the simple pleasures it offers. It is not about reaching one final goal, it’s about the little treats along the way. That is the TRUTH, I promise.


About elroyjones

Married, no children, responsibly self-directed, living happily.
This entry was posted in Friends & Family, Human Condition and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to My Princess

  1. maesprose says:

    That was a lovely note to write her. So true.

    • elroyjones says:

      Lately, all of the younger generation is in transition- wedding for one, baby for another, and a likely divorce for the third. I am doing my best to remain objective, I tell them all “I had my turn, this is your turn, you do what’s right for you.” Lofty words from a woman who’d like to scream from frustration- “Why can’t you see what’s, plain as day, right in front of your face?!” In my next life I will be a better person, Mae but for now I wonder how they can be the way they are and why can’t they keep it to themselves? Deep cleansing breaths, chanting, “This is not my turn, this is not my turn… .”

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